Cowboys RB Roulette: Pollard-Zeke Meets Herschel-Dorsett?

WHITT'S END 11.4.22:

Whether you’re at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt’s End …

*Week 5: Quarterback controversy. Week 10: Running back controversy?

Asked this week if Tony Haullard was a better running back than Ezekiel Elliott, Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones offered a quick, emphatic answer.

“No,” he said. “He’s a different running back than Zeke. It’s pick your poison. But Zeke is so punishing, and that takes its toll on a defense.”

Maybe, but …

With a sharp performance in last week’s rout of the Chicago Bears, Dak Prescott has made us all but forget about Cooper Rush’s successful stand-in. But Pollard’s eye-popping production and unique skills have done nothing but amplify fans who think he deserves to be RB1 over Elliott.

Pollard promised to “haul it” in Zeke’s absence against Chicago with a sprained knee, and he did just that with 131 yards and three touchdowns on only 14 carries. On his 18-yard touchdown run, he made a smooth jump-cut into a gaping hole up the middle before totally juking a safety with a sharp move to his right. In the fourth quarter he hopped into a hole and then used breakaway speed on a 54-yard scoring dash.

Zeke has two NFL rushing titles, but he no longer has the ability to score on either of those two plays.

For now, Pollard is handling his secondary situation better than, say, Tony Dorsett.

It’s been almost 40 years since the Cowboys had a good, old-fashioned running back controversy. In 1986, Dorsett more than got his feathers ruffled by the arrival of a current polarizing political candidate named Herschel Walker.

Sensing Walker’s immense talent and the imminent demise of the USFL, Cowboys general manager Tex Schramm selected him in the fifth round of the 1985 NFL Draft. When the USFL folded and Walker arrived in Dallas, he was rewarded with the richest contract in NFL history: five years, $5 million.

Schramm and coach Tom Landry envisioned a “Dream Duo” backfield, lining up Walker alongside co-Heisman Trophy winner Dorsett. That fantasy, however, immediately turned into a nightmare as Dorsett, an aging star who helped win Super Bowl XII in 1977, demanded a trade.

“I’m unhappy,” Dorsett said at the time. “I don’t want to be here being second fiddle to any running back in Dallas.”

In his first game as a Cowboy in 1986, Walker scored the game-winning touchdown against the Giants in the final minute on Monday Night Football. Later in the season he produced a still-standing team record of 292 total yards of offense in a victory over Philadelphia.

Dorsett was traded to the Broncos in 1988.

For the most part Walker was a good player on bad teams, never managing a winning record during his 81-game stint in Dallas. He made the Pro Bowl in 1987-88, and on Dec. 18, 1988 scored on a 1-yard run at Texas Stadium that was the final touchdown coached by Landry before his 29-year career ended when with his 1989 firing by Jones.

His real value to the Cowboys came not as a player, but an asset.

In 1989 they traded him to the Vikings in what is widely regarded as the most lopsided deal in NFL history. In return for one player, the Cowboys received five players and six draft picks that they ultimately parlayed into stars such as running back Emmitt Smith, safety Darren Woodson and Super Bowl wins in 1992, ’93 and ’95.

Dorsett wound up in Canton. Walkers remains prominent in Cowboys’ history, ranking in the Top 10 in rushing yards and touchdowns.

Then: Schramm went with the shiny new toy, ultimately trading the veteran.

Now: Jones says, “We’re going to go as Zeke goes.”

*I know, I know. Luka Doncic is off to an epic start and is the early favorite for NBA MVP. But – hear me out – he’s got to be even better if the Dallas Mavericks are going to match, much less top, last season’s run to the Western Conference Finals.

Granted, it’s difficult, almost irrational, to fathom Doncic doing more.

In this week’s victory over the Utah Jazz he became the first player in 60 years – since Wilt Chamberlain, for crying out loud – to begin a season with seven consecutive 30-point games. Before that, he was the first player in league history with 200 points, 50 rebounds and 50 assists in his team’s first six games. And no team is more reliant upon a single player than the Mavs on Luka, evidenced by the fact he averages a league-leading – and mind-boggling – 558 dribbles per game. (For context, known ball-hog James Harden averages almost 100 fewer.)

That said – especially in light of last year’s success – the Mavs and Doncic are long past being satiated by his individual accolades. Luka might win an MVP, but this season will be a failure if Dallas doesn’t win enough games to get back to the West Finals.

Bottom line: So far in crunch time he’s 0 of 3.

The Mavs have lost three games, and Luka’s had a potential game-winning shot bounce off the rim at the buzzer in all of them. In Phoenix he missed a 30-foot 3-pointer with 1.2 seconds left in a two-point loss. Same in New Orleans, where he missed a long step-back triple with 0.4 seconds remaining in another two-point defeat. And in last weekend’s overtime home loss to the Thunder, he missed a 17-foot jumper with 1.1 seconds left in regulation.

To win MVP and drag his team to new heights, Luka will have to make at least a couple of game-winners along the way.

If this sounds like asking Superman to not only vanquish the villains but also pick up the trash on his way out of town … yes, that’s exactly what it is. Heavy is the head, after all, that wears the crown.

*New Texas Rangers manager Bruce Bochy and his sparkling resume won’t mean a thing without an improved pitching staff. How about a 2023 rotation led by left-handers incumbent ace Martin Perez, San Francisco Giants’ star Carlos Rodon and … Derek Holland?

Nope, that’s not a 10-year-old typo. Folks close to Holland say the one-time Ranger is seriously considering calling Rangers' general manager Chris Young and asking for an invitation to spring training in February.

The 36-year-old Holland, who still lives in DFW, is a free agent after pitching only briefly in the minors for the Boston Red Sox and Toronto Blue Jays this season. In 2021 he appeared in 39 games as a reliever with the Detroit Tigers.

After leaving the Rangers in 2017 he pitched for five teams, including Bochy’s Giants in 2018-19. Holland went 62-50 with the Rangers in eight seasons and authored one of the most clutch performances in franchise history with a two-hit, Game 4 shutout of the St. Louis Cardinals that evened the 2011 World Series at 2-2.

*So Duncanville High School gets caught “cheating” and is stripped of a boys state basketball championship. Sounds fair. Rules, after all, are rules. Unless when, apparently, it comes to the Houston Astros. Remind me again why the Astros were caught cheating in 2017 and allowed to keep their World Series?

Five years later, I still can’t look at Jose Altuve without his infamous “buzzer” being my first thought.

*I’m officially one step from being the “get off my lawn!” old man. As in, no thanks, I have no interest in seeing Stevie Nicks and Billy Joel in concert next April at AT&T Stadium. In the 1970s I loved their music. But Nicks is 74; Joel 73. I mean, really? Can’t imagine either of them putting on much of a “show”, but rather just sitting and singing. No doubt they sounded better in their 20s than 70s, right? Spare me the traffic and the cost of a ticket and I’ll just sit at home and listen to their vinyl. 

Of course, I’m also the guy that last month went to Dallas Shakespeare in The Park’s “Hamlet” and dozed off in the middle of “To be, or not to be … ”

*Cool convergence in Arlington last weekend as – on the 20th anniversary of Emmitt Smith breaking the NFL’s all-time rushing record held by Walter Payton – the Cowboys hosted the Bears with former hole-opening fullback Daryl Johnston in Fox’s TV booth. 

Said Emmitt during a live cameo, “It goes to show you how fast time flies.” 

After 20 years, Smith’s record of 18,355 yards is so safe it may never be broken. Two decades later Payton is still second. Smith’s nearest “active” pursuer is – no kidding – 32-year-old Saints backup Mark Ingram, who is 10,281 yards behind. (Adrian Peterson, a mere 3,437 yards behind Smith, isn’t technically retired but nor is he on a team this season.) Behind Ingram is the Cowboys’ Elliott with 7,829. In other words, no NFL running back at or near his prime is even close to 10,000 yards. 

Again, Emmitt sits beyond 18,000.

*Hot.

*Not.

*Put a sock in it about high gas prices and inflation and woe-is-me America falling apart. Times are so “tough” that an all-time record 2.5 million people visited this year’s State Fair of Texas, including more than 200,000 on Texas-OU Saturday. And times are so “tough” that Texas gubernatorial candidates Beto O’Rourke ($10.5) and Greg Abbott ($9) have raised almost $20 million in campaign funding ahead of Tuesday’s election. According to filings from the Texas Ethics Commission, a $500,000 donation was made to Abbott by none other than Jerry Jones.

*What are we doing calling it “gubernatorial”? How about just “governatorial”?

*Anyone else distracted by the Mavs’ digital advertising splattered all over their American Airlines Center court? I find myself not watching the ball, but eyeing the pixelated TXU Energy logo instead. Maybe that’s the point.

*Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: The Rangers have a young pitching prospect that is killing it in the Arizona Fall League. This year it’s third overall draft pick Kumar Rocker, who hurled three more shutout innings this week for the Surprise Saguaros. 

Tease me once, shame on me. Tease me a thousand times, shame on the Rangers’ farm system.

*My days on Twitter might be numbered, as I’ll be damned if I’m going to pay to keep a blue verification checkmark to provide content on – and for – a social media platform. If anything, shouldn’t Twitter pay me to provide said content? Twitter won’t miss all the media, until, that is, outlets start breaking news and providing content for consumers on a competing platform. 

New Twitter owner Elon Musk is worth $209 billion. He bought the company for $44 billion. But now he’s haggling with his supposedly VIP members as though we’re in a Guadalajara flea market? First he threatened to charge $19.99 a month to remain verified. Then – after intense push-back – he offered to drop the charge to $8. 

It remains free or I’m done.

*Cowboys opened the season with 14-1 Super Bowl odds. After Prescott’s fractured thumb they dropped as low as 50-1. Now they’re back to 14-1, behind only the Bills, Eagles, Chiefs and 49ers.

*Marriage is impossibly hard. Latest evidence: Tom Brady is worth $333 million and is the winningest player in the history of the NFL. Gisele Bündchen is worth $400 million is the world’s highest-paid model. Together they own a $17 million mansion in Miami, a $1 million “office” nearby and homes in Costa Rica, The Bahamas and Montana, along with a $3 million penthouse apartment in New York City. They have three children. Oh, and they look like this. 

And you’re telling me that somewhere in the midst of all that fame and fortune and success and sexiness they found time to hate each other?

*Wait, I thought conservatives despised “cancel culture”? How are they explaining the boycott of Cracker Barrel for – gasp! – having the audacity to offer healthy food? Seems the old country store and restaurant recently introduced vegan sausage and its overalls-wearing, gravy-bathing customers are offended by the “woke” menu. If you don’t like the item, um, how about just not ordering it? 

Some people aren’t happy unless they’re mad.

*Cowboys would have been a better team had they been able to pull off the trade for Houston Texans’ receiver Brandin Cooks. Fitting that they’re looking for receiver help a couple months after practically giving away Amari Cooper. Their leading receiver is CeeDee Lamb with only 556 yards. This is the first time in 50 years the Cowboys haven’t had a 100-yard game from a receiver through eight games.

*Nancy Pelosi’s 82-year-old husband gets attacked with a hammer – suffering a fractured skull – and the Republican Party of Collin County responds with jokes and memes and lies about the men being lovers caught in their underwear. There are times I’m embarrassed to call Collin County home. This being one of them.

*This is the 11th time in Jones’ era the Cowboys have started 6-2. The previous 10 they made the playoffs.

*Regardless of party affiliation, go vote on Tuesday. Cast your vote, or bite your tongue.

*What do you mean an inmate just “walked away” from federal prison in Seagoville?

*Legitimate sports questions: Why is tripping illegal in football? Why can’t baseball be played in the rain? Why do NBA teams need head coaches?

*Looking for an early Christmas bonus? Saturday’s Powerball drawing is worth a cool $1.5 billion (only a mere $745 million for the cash option). There have been 38 in a row without a winner. Good luck!

*ESPN’s Stephen A. Smith makes $8 million a year and claims he’s underpaid. Sounds preposterous, until you consider that Troy Aikman makes $18 million. While the NFL analyst works one night a week for half the year, Smith is seemingly on every ESPN show all day long. 

He’s obnoxious. But he also has a point.

*Remember to set your clock back an hour Saturday night. Next week it will be dark at 4:45 in the afternoon. Goodnight, everyone. See y’all March 12 when Daylight Savings Time returns.

*This Weekend? Friday let’s mosey over to Fort Worth for women’s professional tennis. Saturday let’s mosey to the Dallas Zoo for a soiree. Sunday let’s mosey to the couch for a day of Cowboys-less NFL. As always, don’t be a stranger.

Follow Richie Whitt on Twitter